For $26K a month you can rent the hideously remodeled London house where Herman Melville once lived!

If you like wall-to-wall beige carpeting, recessed lighting, and sprawling, beautiful, half-mad epics of the human soul, do we have the real estate listing for you! Apparently Herman Melville stayed for a for weeks in 1849 at 25 Craven Street, Charing Cross, London (there’s a plaque there, and everything!).

If you’re interested (lol, why are you reading this blog), the Thames-adjacent, six-floor Georgian is a sprawling 4,400 square feet and is thoroughly charmless (see below).

This looks like a hastily posted Airbnb listing thrown together by college kids who blew through the semester’s stipend WAY too soon.

The drapes do not, in fact, match the carpets.

Not pictured: a fridge full of vodka coolers, takeout boxes, mustard, and one dried-out apple.

This looks like they raided a senior center in Slough.

NB: Picture taken during that one sunny weekend last June.