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    Reading Ron DeSantis’s dull ChatBot prose for the MAGA speak it really is.

    Jonny Diamond

    February 28, 2023, 10:23am

    In a surprise to no one, aspiring presidential strong man and virtuosically charmless MAGA suit-stay Ron DeSantis has written a bland and charmless campaign memoir, out today. Early reports indicate that The Courage to Be Free (lol) is that most dangerous kind of document: superficially anodyne and forgettable in the quality of its prose, deeply sinister in its underlying ideologies.

    Assorted quotes and excerpts have been popping up over the last few days, at various right wing outlets. Though they read like a slightly breathless brochure for a Boca timeshare, it’s all pretty fucking scary.

    QUOTE: “While the Walt Disney Company and its executives had a right to indulge in woke activism, Florida did not have to place the company on a pedestal while they do so—especially when the company’s activism impacted the rights of parents and the well-being of children.”
    Translation: We will bring the full force of the government into your private family decisions.

    QUOTE: “We also refused to bow down to the woke mob and fought ideological capture of our schools and fought back against big corporations that pursued a leftist agenda.”
    Translation: We abhor the idea of history as the ongoing pursuit of countervailing facts in opposition to dominant mythologies; we refuse to acknowledge the dignity and diversity of individual Americans whose lives exist outside the narrow and antiquated vision of the aforementioned mythologies.

    QUOTE: “The Florida Blueprint is a simple formula: be willing to lead, have the courage of your convictions, deliver for your constituents, and reap the political rewards. This is a blueprint for America’s revival. We’ve shown it can be done.”
    Translation: We’re coming for the rest of you.

    QUOTE: “Trump supported policies that appealed to the base in a way that GOP leaders in the DC swamp had been either incapable of doing or unwilling to do.”
    Translation: Turns out being an openly racist demagogue who is contemptuous of democracy and the Constitution can be a recipe for political success.

    QUOTE: “I had developed a good relationship with the president largely because I supported his initiatives in Congress and opposed the Russia collusion conspiracy theory.”
    Translation: Conservative Russians also hate gay people, which is good.

    QUOTE: “Disney ultimately caved to leftist media and activist pressure and pressed the false narrative against the [Don’t Say Gay] bill.”
    Translation: I’m going to be the governor who actually brings Disney to heel.

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