Pamela Anderson loves announcing major life decisions with poetry.

Twelve days after The Hollywood Reporter announced that Pamela Anderson had secretly married producer (and self-proclaimed “Trump of Hollywood”) Jon Peters, they further announced that the two have called the whole thing off.

If you’re wondering why this is literary news, have I got the poems for you! Well, one original poem, written by Anderson announcing the marriage, and one quote from the journals of Sylvia Plath, on the occasion of its end.

Here’s Anderson’s poem, which she gave as a statement to The Hollywood Reporter (more public statement poems, please):

“Jon is the original ‘bad boy’ of Hollywood –
no one compares –
I love him deeply like family.
His life used to scare me.
So much for a girl like me.
Now I’ve seen more of life
and realize ..
He’s been there all along.
Never failed me –
I’m ready now
and
he’s ready too –
We
understand
and respect each other –
We love each other
without conditions. –
I’m a lucky woman. –
Proof
God has a plan”

“Remember, remember,
this is now, and now, and now.
Live it, feel it, cling to it.
I want to become acutely aware of all I’ve taken for granted.”

Sylvia Plath pic.twitter.com/FMSYfR7zxw

— Pamela Anderson (@pamfoundation) February 2, 2020

I guess the joke’s on us for ranking Anderson last on this fictional booksellers list.

[h/t The Cut]