Mothers in children’s books: a matrix.

One of the unexpected joys of parenthood is developing unnecessarily strong opinions about children’s book characters. That’s what happens when you spend hours and hours reading the same words over and over. You have to entertain yourself somehow. Or, I do.

So just for fun, and in honor of the obvious impending holiday, I’ve plotted 24 mothers from well-known children’s stories—which in this case I am defining as picture books, early readers, and fairy tales, though technically the category is rather wider—on a Good Parent matrix. (For the record, I know “toxic” and “has a good therapist” are not mutually exclusive, but the latter can be a fairly good bulwark against the former. For “present” vs. “absent” I make no apologies.) As always, feel free to nominate additions in the comments below.

For the parents of toddlers out there, you can also consider this a pretty solid reading list. Happy Mother’s Day.

[Click to enlarge]

Mrs. Mallard, Make Way for Ducklings by Robert McCloskey

Listen, she may be picky, but she’s also correct.

Grace’s Ma, Amazing Grace by Mary Hoffman, ill. Caroline Binch

May we all have parents who support our dreams and ambitions. Shoutout to Grace’s Nana, too.

Little Bear’s Mother, Little Bear by Else Molmelund Minarik, ill. Maurice Sendak

The absolute picture of tolerance.

Lisa’s Mom, Corduroy by Don Freeman

Lisa’s Mom is the chicest mom on the list. She’s not a pushover, but she’s not too strict either; the woman knows about healthy boundaries and personal responsibility. Not to mention hats.

Little Star’s Mother, A Big Mooncake for Little Star by Grace Lin

It almost seems like Little Star eating the mooncake was the plan all along.

The Country Bunny, The Country Bunny and the Little Gold Shoes, Du Bose Heyward, ill. Marjorie Flack

The Country Bunny is a single parent with 21 children. Well, she raised them right—to take care of themselves and each other—and as a result of her efforts, when she re-enters the workforce, she gets her dream job, the requirements of which are being kind, swift, and wise. That’ll show those Jack Rabbits.

Mommy, Love You Forever by Robert Munsch, ill. Sheila McGraw

I don’t care how much you love your adult son, you cannot be climbing into his window at night to hold him in your arms. Among other things, his wife is not going to appreciate that. Gotta admire the dexterity on this old lady, though.

The Mother Bunny, The Runaway Bunny by Margaret Wise Brown, ill. Clement Hurd

Points for transmogrification, but perhaps the little bunny just needs a little bit of personal freedom?

Sophie’s Mummy, The Tiger Who Came to Tea by Judith Kerr

The main problem I have with Sophie’s Mummy is the image in which both she and Sophie explain what happened with the tiger to Daddy, both of them drawn to look like desperate children. You’re a grown-up, Sophie’s Mummy!

The Old Woman, “The Old Woman Who Lived in a Shoe” by Mother Goose

I’ll let the original verse speak for itself:

There was an old woman who lived in a shoe.
She had so many children, she didn’t know what to do.
She gave them some broth without any bread;
And whipped them all soundly and put them to bed.

The Giving Tree, The Giving Tree by Shel Silverstein

The Giving Tree is not technically the Kid’s mother, but it might as well be. Either way, it definitely needs to learn about boundaries.

Jack’s Mother, “Jack and the Beanstalk”

Jack is the villain in this story, you know. He accidentally stumbles on the house of a nice couple, and after being taken in and fed by the kind wife, he proceeds to repeatedly rob them, and finally murder the husband. His mother, thrilled with the money he is bringing home, willfully ignores the signs of her child’s turpitude. Gold is good, baby! Tale as old as time.

Mother Bruce, Mother Bruce by Ryan T. Higgins

The least willing “mother” on the list, but still manages to do an okay job.

Pierre’s Mother, Pierre by Maurice Sendak

If your sensitive child is back-talking you, abandoning them to the lions while you go into town is simply not what Dr. Becky would suggest.

Sal’s Mother, Blueberries for Sal by Robert McCloskey

Toddlers can be super annoying when you’re trying to collect blueberries. But if you live in bear country, it might be a good idea to keep your tasty little child in sight.

Mother, The Cat in the Hat by Dr. Seuss

Which is more toxic? Leaving your children in the care of a fish…

The Mother, Good Dog, Carl by Alexandra Day

…or leaving your baby in the care of a dog?

Mayzie, Horton Hatches the Egg by Dr. Seuss

Mayzie is “a lazy bird” who is “tired and bored” of sitting on her egg, and would much rather take a vacation, so she fobs her duties off on a passing elephant and decamps to Palm Beach. She decides to abandon the egg entirely, and it is only by happenstance that she sees it hatch, at which point, the work being done (ha ha ha, Theodore), she decides she wants it back. (Luckily for everyone, the elephant-bird prefers to stick with the one who sat.)

Eloise’s Mother, Eloise by Kay Thompson, ill. Hilary Knight

Eloise’s Mother does not appear in Eloise. She has left her six year old to live in the Plaza with a nanny while she goes to Europe and to Paris and sometimes to Virginia with her lawyer. On the other hand, she does have a charge account at Bergdorf’s, which is a quality I always wanted in a mother.

Peter’s Mom, The Snowy Day by Ezra Jack Keats

Peter may spend most of his day on his own, but when he gets home, his mother is there to patiently listen to him, take off his wet socks, and run him a bath.

Mama Llama, Llama Llama Red Pajama by Ann Dewdney

Other mammals would snap when faced with so much llama drama, but Mama Llama never seems to.

Mrs. Rabbit, The Tale of Peter Rabbit by Beatrix Potter

Mrs. Rabbit is an exceptionally laid-back and well-adjusted parent, considering her husband was recently murdered and eaten by their neighbor.

The Mother Bird, Are You My Mother? by P.D. Eastman

I realize she was trying to get food to feed her newborn, but timing is everything.

Max’s Mother, Where the Wild Things Are by Maurice Sendak

Like Eloise’s Mother, Max’s Mother doesn’t even appear in the book—but unlike her, we know she’s there. Is it a little toxic to threaten not to give your child dinner? Probably, but he seems like a handful, and he ate in the end.